dear banana bread oatmeal,
just because i want high fiber oatmeal instead of sugar-laden carbohydrate death does NOT mean that i want YOU to replace apples and cinnamon in the multipack of 3 flavors! maple brown sugar, cinnamon spice, and banana asshole: one of these things is NOT like the others. no amount of office non-dairy creamer can repair this catastrophe. i am sad. never enter my mouth ever again. (twss)
with sadness and a pukey face,

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