Dear Angelina Jolie,

I got so excited last night when I saw on people.com that you'd checked into a hospital in Nice in anticipation of the birth of your twins. I mean, Shiloh is so adorable that the only thing cuter would be a pair of Shilohs! Unfortunately for me, your doctor just gave a statement that your twins probably will be baking for a couple more weeks. Maybe this is good; maybe the world isn't quite ready to behold the utter cuteness. Maybe you're trying to preempt the Beijing Olympics? I don't know, but either way, please pop those kids out quickly. I can't wait to stand in line at Safeway and page through magazines full of baby Jolie-Pitt pictures, and feel my uterus squeal with pleasure.

Love,
R