Dear DC Cabbie Who Better Watch His Fucking Back and Keep His Kids in the House:
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! ROLLING MY ARM UP IN THE WINDOW AND DRAGGING ME HALF A BLOCK?!??! YOU RUINED MY LIGHT-UP STRIPPER SHOES, YOU DOUCHELORD!!! And no one even got your info!!!! (Mostly b/c they were watching my shoes do a fucking disco light show.)
It's on, bitch. I am going to fucking rain all over the DC Cab Association or whatever that shit is called. I used to be a fucking personal injury lawyer, you sorry sack of shit. I can't find you, but I'm going to fuck over the rest of your kind.
I will kill the next asshole who has the balls to ask where I'm going before he lets me in the cab, I swear to fucking Vishnu,