Dear Inability To Have Just One Adult Beverage,

Yes well, here we are....mmmk you are really starting to become a problem. All of the sudden (okay maybe not all of the sudden), I've turned into that girl. You know, the friend you can always count on to be saying/doing ridiculous things within 20 minutes of putting the first sip to her lips. You actually are very entertaining, I'll give you that, but when it comes to being around people that I would like to maintain a proper decorum around, you don't help. Actually you make the problem infinity times worse. So, if you could do me a fave and team up with Trying To Be The Drinking Champion and back off for a little, that would be much appreciated.

Also, if you could help stop me from making passes at cabdrivers, talking to guys who look like they lure preteen boys in chatrooms for fun, and showing my panties/boobies to everyone alive, that would be a nice perk.

Please Review This Request Under Strong Consideration,
A