Dear Coworker Speaking in Hushed Tone Because You Think It Means We Can't Still Overhear You,

You want to move out of your house because your apparently schizophrenic girlfriend is driving *you* crazy? Think for a second how much it must suck to hear and see things that everyone else insists aren't there. My sympathy factor for you is nonexistent, and I feel even worse for your girlfriend because not only is she actually going crazy, but her boyfriend is telling the whole office that he'd rather play video games at a friend's house than be at her side to offer love and support.

It seems like that's sort of like breaking up with someone who has cancer, and that just makes me sad.

Learning that good men really don't exist anymore,
R