Dear Famous Writer,

Just writing to say...I'm not all creeped out by the fact that you hugged me and sort of kissed the side my head. Really. You're an angsty individual; I understand. Glad I could help. I'm pretty angsty as well and I know you're definitely old enough to be my father. Hopefully you realize this too.

Also, I almost got thrown out of a moving car for you. The guy that was driving said he thought you were gay and I almost kicked him in the face.

Going to bat for tortured artists everywhere,
Trixie