Dear Hibatchi Grill Master,

Ok, so last night when my family and I got you, you looked like a German-American, so I thought for sure there was no way you were going to properly make those little onion volcanoes. Boy, was I wrong! You are possibly the most adroit human being I have ever witnessed. Flipping the salt and pepper shaker and catching it on your hat, behind your back, and on your shoulder! Then, preparing a delicious meal for your table of onlookers. I'm sorry, I know it was neither the time nor the place, but you really turned me on. As my parents were trying to ask me how my classes were going, I was staring intently at your nimble hands wondering about all the things they could do to my body.

MMmmm,
A