Please come back. I am sorry I slept with Condescending, Arrogant Co-worker even though I knew you would suffer eventually.
I won't do it again. I will have a very stern chat with Will Power about resisting his glances and scent of his cologne, and I will also speak with Libido about dialing it down a few notches.
If you come back I'll make it up to you! How about yoga? A membership at the new Y downtown? An even more handsome and successful man to make you feel better?
Begging for your speedy return,