Dear Michael Jackson Impersonator,

Arriving an hour and a half late and then demanding to get paid full price is sooooo stupid of you. Do you KNOW who I am and what I can do to you? Get over yourself. You weren't even worth the initial investment that I was willing to put up for you to perform.

Tell me again how you can do a "Thriller" performance and: a) not bring your own music, stating that "Everyone has 'Thriller'", b) do the SAME dance for the entire 6 minute song, and c) not even lipsinc the lyrics because you didn't know them? Thank God I saved my money.

Oh and don't worry about the verbal assassination I issued you when you asked where the rest of your money was. It was nothing personal...no wait, yes it was, but it doesn't make you special. It just forever places you on my shit list, right under "Crab-faced racist lunch lady" and just below "Inefficient A**hole".

Good thing the $3 drinks got my bf drunk enough not to notice that you sucked.


Keep your day job, a**hole,
TR