Dear Research Methods Paper/Professor,

Every relationship has its ups and downs. Our little threesome has been especially rocky. You, professor, let me skip class (because it is a waste of my life) with no penalty because I don't think you notice due to your pregnancy. I love when you forget to take attendance! However, you, 15 page paper, are RUINING MY LIFE!!!!!! I'm breaking up with you and ignoring the fact that you are due tomorrow.

I'll probably fail your class,
Alyse