Dear Fool Whose Entrance Card Got "Demagnitized",

I'm sorry, but I could not help but laugh at your expense today. I told you that you shouldn't tailgate people into our apartment complex because your car would get hit by the security bar. I like how you assured me many times over that it wouldn't and then proceeded to speed in behind someone prefacing it with "i have this perfected. see, watch this." I don't know why you felt the need to show off in front of me, a sweaty pedestrian just trying to stretch out after my leisurely jog, but things really did not work out in your favor. It's really a shame that your pride cost you a giant dent in your Beamer SUV. Maybe I should have told you I'm never wrong?

A