Dear Walmart,

Why am I so embarrassed by the way you so openly display condoms. You constantly make me and my boo do an "avoid all people around this isle" dance for god knows how long it takes the people to clear out. And, I should add, its right next to the school supplies... did you even think about the kids? And the poor old folks that don't have sex anymore because their vag's are dangly, wrinkled, and dry and their penis's are inoperable... they are just trying to pick up their 'help me not die' medicine from the pharmacy. Lord help them not have a heartattack over us fornicating kids. Finally, why must a price check always be announced with this purchase. I'm starting to think that your corporation doesn't support safe sex.

On the path to pregnancy and STDs,

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