Dear Guys Who Use Pet Names,

Pet names are only acceptable after the following date ranges:

1 day – 1 week: nothing but your name or nickname that your friends use
1 week – 3 weeks: hunn, sweetie, darlin'
3 weeks – 1.5 months: baby, princess

1.5 months and on: Almost anything is game. This includes sexual names and joking funny names.

NEVER under any circumstance is the phrase "my love" acceptable. If you are old and rich and I am 29 without a man…I may consider "my love" as we are both running out of time to find acceptable mates.

Also, calling a girl "bug" is NOT a turn on. "Aww bug." "My love bug." "Bug, whatcha doing?" A bug is neither cute nor feminine. I mean, seriously, where do guys come up with this shit?

I'm buggin',
Em

3 comments:

ML said...

i have to disagree with you. my boyfriend calls me his "love". i realize it's extremely outdated but it works for some people.

Em said...

sorry, but when a guy says that to me I vomit a bit in my mouth...i guess it just depends

ML said...

LOL it's cool dude - honestly, i think that it depends on your past experience with a pet name, too. i've never had anybody else call me that, so i never had any reason to think badly of it. but yeah ... pet names are tricky. :)