Dear KB,

WOOOOOOOOOOW!
You really showed me who's the grown woman here.

Here's the 411:
We went to elementary school together. You lived on my block. I knew your mom. 6th grade, we graduated, you met my current bf in junior high and you guys are still "cool". I re-met you 2.5 years ago when me and the bf got together. You seemed cool, but a bit vain (i should have known then).
I invited you to everything we have done over the past 2 years. You always found some way to turn me down and make me feel like you were better than me. Including the time you told me that I shouldn't have my birthday party at the club that I worked at in Hollywood because that was so "childish", but instead i should have it at a comedy club because THEN, and only then, you would go. (What a b*tch!)
Yet and still, i invited your self-centered ass to my bf's camping trip, even against my bf's wishes, and THIS is what you do? You send me an email not only saying that you can't go (duh), but also telling me how you need to save for your wedding, you got a brand new car, you are looking for the "perfect house" because you guys are planning on having babies in a year, and also adding that me and dom are just doing "different things than we are trying to do" and that you have better things to do.
YOU F*CKING B*TCH!

So, when I replied that you were a self-centered, tactless tranny, I expected you to reply, but not like this.

I believe your words were "I don't f*cking know you, and me and your bf are like family. I have known him my ENTIRE LIFE" (ok, if you have been keeping up, i said me and her went to elementary school together and THEN she met my bf in junior high. the bitch is deranged.)

you also added that "you have only been around a hot second, me and your bf know each other. i don't know you. you JUST came on the scene".
(if i'm not mistaken, me and my bf have been dating for 2.5 years. where the f*ck has this b*tch been?)

She ends with "Sweetie, you need to get on my grown woman game and stop acting like a child."
(That part was totally my fave. hahahhaahhahahah!)


So what I am really trying to say, KB, is: Thanks...for proving that you are an egotistical, vapid troglodyte who wants everyone to believe that her life is perfect.

Here is my gift to you, you condescending ass bulldog: a bridge...so you can get the f*ck over it.
TR

p.s. Congrats on the wedding!