Dear me,

I'm glad that YOU thought it was a good idea for you to drive last night instead of your boyfriend. Because, in MY humble opinion, I think you are borderline autistic.

After a nice round of Cadillac margaritas (no salt), 2 beers, and a half a glass of Adios, your ass was ADIOS! Yet and still, when bf started throwing up and pissing (at the same time) on the side of a random building, you thought you were seriously hot shit because you hardly even felt nauseous. Now, I am no rocket scientist, but I don't think that is a good indicator of whether you are sober enough to drive.

I'm just glad that you kept yourself awake by yelling random curse words at bf, who was passed out long before the key hit the ignition.

Never again again,
TR