Dear Life,

You are a tricksy little fucker, aren't you? On Saturday, when you decided to replay the exact fight I used to have every day with Guy Who Broke My Heart, only instead of Guy Who Broke My Heart it was New Guy I Am Kinda Seeing And Am Terrified Of Showing My Crazy To, did you think that was funny?! I hope you had a good laugh, because me, Hormones, and Beer Tears sure thought it was a HOOT.

Please, feel free to bring up the fact that I'm terrified of committment, withhold my feelings from people for fear of getting hurt, and just generally damaged whenever the fuck you feel like it. In the middle of a group of friends at a crowded bar on a Saturday night? WHY NOT. That's a perfect opportunity to bring up all my emotional shortcomings!

I thought it was especially great how you managed to not only embarass me in public by making me cry, but also simultaneously expose me for the looney that I am to New Guy AND bring back a flood of memories of Guy Who Broke My Heart and the multitude of things I did wrong in that relationship before he walked out on me and I never heard from him again. It was really poignant, the A-ha Moment I had when I realized that even though I have supposedly moved on with my life, nothing has really changed in the past three years. At all.

Thanks A Mil,
CF

1 comment:

Shameless said...

Actually, you're wrong, things have changed. Guy Who Broke Your Heart was an emotionally stunted toolbox who treated you like crap. New Guy You are Kind of Seeing is an honest to god nice boy who actually cares about you.
That's a pretty significant change, so you must be doing something right this time around.
My Two Cents.