Dear bf's good guy friend,
Hey buddy...yeah...um...I mean...me and you...we're cool and all...but...I...um...don't think we are cool enough for you to not only pat my ass the other night at your party, but for you to commence the cupping and full-on grab/squeeze of my ass. That, my dear, is reserved for the man that gives me the peen (aka my bf/your best bud).
So how bout this: how bout you act like i DON'T have the biggest and most "grabbable" ass of this century (although i REALLY do), and I won't tell my gigantic man of a boyfriend what you did. Deal?
oh yeah, and i think you totally dipped into a crease that you weren't even supposed to be near, MISTER! *wags finger*
p.s. and just for the record, it is funny when i do it to you and your fiancee (yeah, remember her?), and it's funny when she does it to me, but not so funny when you try to get in on the action. Alcohol induced Faux lesbian lovin = ok/funny. Get it?