Dear Crush,

God, why?!?!

Of course I discreetly make an appointment at the health center to get a nether region issue checked out. I go to school with 12,000 people. A sea of anonymous persons. Who shows up right next to me in the back waiting room? You.

Oh yes, I have been intentionally avoiding you. I'm shy (go figure).

Here's where God's sick tricks come in. (It's probably punishment for this blog). So , I get called in the room we are sitting outside of chitchatting/flirting (I don't know why I avoid you in the first place because you are actually quite delightful and cute as hell). After miss doctor woman does a brief investigation, she walks outside the door to VERY AUDIBLY consult about the less than desirable condition of my groin. I can hear her through the thick closed door as if she is next to me. You were basically 3 feet away from her outside rapidly losing any slight attraction you may have ever had for me. Awesome.

This tops the last time I went to the gyno and some pregnant chick's husband walked in the wrong room and got a full 360 view of my cha-cha in the stirrups.

God Help Me,

P.S. When you crossed your legs like that, I could see right up your shorts. Totally hot.
P.P.S. I'm trying to beat you to the punch of running for cover here, which I'm surprised you haven't done all guys inevitably do.
P.P.P.S. I just checked my sent messages from last night when I was bombed and I kinda want to kill myself.

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