Dear Desperate Landlords:

When I advertised on Craigslist that I am interested in a 2br near the metro in Washington, DC, I mean that I am interested in a 2BR NEAR A METRO IN WASHINGTON DC! That is not code for me wanting to live anywhere BUT DC and AS FAR AWAY FROM A METRO AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE!

Please stop sending me emails trying to pawn off your dank Maryland or super inconvenient NVA properties on my roommate and I! I don't care how modern your kitchen is or how spacious the bedrooms are if we are going to need to commute more than desired (read post below about annoying tourists on morning commute)! Opening your photo attachments will not lead me to reevaluating my desired live style or change my cemented stereotypes against MD.

Fuck Off,
Massie