Dear Sex,

Why do I suck at you so bad lately? I know it can't be a coincidence and the last three guys I've slept with were the ones who sucked. They weren't ugly... and I was even drunk. This cannot be happening. Having a baby ruined everything!! How do single moms with no sex drive get married in this town?

Roofie Me So I Can Stop Fucking Up My Reputation,
Errn