Dear New Job-
I love you. Not only do you allow me to wear short jean skirts and cute leggings and fishnet stockings to you, you also provide me with a constant source of caffeine. NOT only that, but you allow me a 50 percent discount on all alcoholic beverages at the two bars you are associated with. I bought Sam (the most beautiful person ever) and myself a drink after you (work) and the total came to 3.75!! I, of course, tipped the bartendress. I can't wait to introduce your discount to ML and other friends.
Crunked on a Tuesday-
Totally. Everyone should have that shirt.