Dear Starbucks,

Even though you are grossly overpriced and give me one hell of a case of ageda' for a couple hours after consuming one of you hi-test caffeinated products, I can't express how much I absolutely love you! Sure, the coffee here is okay, and the coffee I make myself is pretty damn good… but no matter how much coffee I have consumed, one taste of you has my heart ready to explode out of my chest in awakened goodness… need to go smoke a carton or cigarettes now to calm myself down…

Granted, I paid almost $4.00 for a whopping ten ounces of you, but DAMN your'e good. You will keep me awake long enough to fall asleep in my meal on my date tonight… that being considered, I may need to visit you again once I pry myself off the ceiling.

Yours in overpriced caffeinated happy,
J