Dear Friday's Date:
Uhhh...you told me I was a keeper when you were drunk. Forgiveable. You also told me when you were sober. Ummmm...no.
We've been on 2 dates, more or less. You have no way of knowing whether or not I'm a keeper. This point is driven home by the fact that I think you are nice, but don't want to have your babies, which you obviously don't realize. I'm really sorry, but I don't feel it, even though you seem to be a nice, cute, witty, well-employed man who is way into me.** I really don't want to have to hurt your feelings, but I can see you planning our future, and it weirds me out.
Dating is the major pits,
**Note to self: you cleary deserve to die alone