Dear Old Guy Sitting In The Row Across From Me On The Plane This Morning,

Was it really necessary to stare at me for the entirity of our 4.5 hour flight? I'm really not that interesting. If I were you, I would have been spending my energy checking out the dude with the purple mohawk sitting next to you...but that's just me.

Also, thanks for stanking up the lavatory.

Merry Xmas,
A